Bad Bad Juju » The Future

The World Is Flat

Yabu — Tue, 01 May 2012 14:13:02 +0000

I just ordered a new maxed out Catdaddy Macdaddy. Not going to get into OS wars, but I prefer Unix over Windows. To each their own. No big deal. I have a choice, for now. Hell, I bought 1,000 rounds of .357 & .45 yesterday, because I could choose. Slim pickings on bullets around these parts lately.

Anyway, back to my thought:

I checked my order shipping, and below is what I found. My Apple shipped from China.

Anchorage, AK, United States 05/01/2012 3:27 P.M. Departure Scan
05/01/2012 1:20 P.M. Arrival Scan
Shanghai, China 05/01/2012 9:47 P.M. Departure Scan
05/01/2012 8:54 P.M. Departure Scan
Shanghai, China 04/30/2012 10:13 P.M. Export Scan
04/30/2012 6:08 P.M. Arrival Scan
04/30/2012 1:59 P.M. Departure Scan
04/30/2012 12:20 P.M. Origin Scan
China 04/30/2012 11:01 P.M. Order Processed: Ready for UPS

China will become the next superpower, if not already. Hell, they own our debt, and can crush us without a shot fired. They know this, and they are counting on Americans to become more lazy than they are. We have kids graduating from college who don’t know shit. They can’t find a job. They then go for an advanced degree, spend more money, and still can’t find a job. They’re in some major debt. (I believe Trade Schools will make a major comeback). The government loves it. The more money you owe, the more control they have. We’re being fucked from the inside out, and nobody is paying attention, but they are paying attention to reality shows. Go figure.

I’m not the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I’m telling you…pay close attention to China. They have a plan. We don’t. We take too much for granted.

I’m telling you, when an American company can make more money having their product manufactured or built on the other side of the plant, and ship it over here, we’re fucked.

Think about what you will do if there is a run on the banks. What will you do if the U.S. dollar is devalued? Look at what happened in Argentina. Seriously, study it. Formulate a plan, and do not believe the media is talking reality. They need to make money, and they will do it at your expense. Think about what would happen if the government took control of the media. Look at history before you make a decision. People usually believe what they hear.

On another note: If anyone belives thay BHO was responsible for taking out OBL, they’re smoking crack.

Enthusiasms

Yabu — Wed, 04 Apr 2012 10:33:42 +0000

My friend, the guy with the bullwhip and the monkey, has spanked one again. Go read it, and while you’re at it, read this one as well. Break Left, it’s not what it sounds like.

ARLINGTON CEMETERY

Yabu — Wed, 28 Mar 2012 04:00:04 +0000

From the Mailbag.

I’ve seen it before. Make your throat thick, so to say.

Tomb of the Unknown Soldier

1. How many steps does the guard take during his walk across the tomb of the Unknowns, and why?

21 steps: It alludes to the twenty-one gun salute which is the highest honor given any military or foreign dignitary.

2. How long does he hesitate after his about face to begin his return walk and why?

21 seconds for the same reason as answer number 1

3. Why are his gloves wet?

His gloves are moistened to prevent his losing his grip on the rifle.

4. Does he carry his rifle on the same shoulder all the time and, if not, why not?

He carries the rifle on the shoulder away from the tomb. After his march across the path,he executes an about face and moves the rifle to the outside shoulder.

5. How often are the guards changed?

Guards are changed every thirty minutes, twenty-four hours a day, 365 days a year.

6. What are the physical traits of the guard limited to?

For a person to apply for guard duty at the tomb, he must be between 5′ 10′ and 6′ 2′ tall and his waist size cannot exceed 30. They must commit 2 years of life to guard the tomb, live in a barracks under the tomb, and cannot drink any alcohol on or off duty for the rest of their lives. They cannot swear in public for the rest of their lives and cannot disgrace the uniform or the tomb in any way. After two years, the guard is given a wreath pin that is worn on their lapel signifying they served as guard of the tomb. There are only 400 presently worn. The guard must obey these rules for the rest of their lives or give up the wreath pin. The shoes are specially made with very thick soles to keep the heat and cold from their feet. There are metal heel plates that extend to the top of the shoe in order to make the loud click as they come to a halt. There are no wrinkles, folds or lint on the uniform. Guards dress for duty in front of a full-length mirror. The first six months of duty a guard cannot talk to anyone nor watch TV. All off duty time is spent studying the 175 notable people laid to rest in Arlington National Cemetery. A guard must memorize who they are and where they are interred. Every guard spends five hours a day getting his uniforms ready for guard duty.

ETERNAL REST GRANT THEM O LORD AND LET PERPETUAL LIGHT SHINE UPON THEM.

In 2003 as Hurricane Isabelle was approaching Washington, DC, our US Senate/House took 2 days off with anticipation of the storm. On the ABC evening news, it was reported that because of the dangers from the hurricane, the military members assigned the duty of guarding the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier were given permission to suspend the assignment. They respectfully declined the offer, “No way, Sir!” Soaked to the skin, marching in the

pelting rain and winds of a major tropical storm, they said that guarding the Tomb was not just an assignment, it was the highest honor that can be afforded to a service person. The tomb has been patrolled continuously, 24/7, since 1930.

RIP Captain Carroll “Lex” Lefon, USN (ret)

Yabu — Tue, 27 Mar 2012 04:00:33 +0000

Cool Runnings!! Our paths will cross some day. I thank you for your service. God be with you, and those you leave behind. I don’t know what else to say.

It Would Be So Easy

Yabu — Sun, 11 Mar 2012 23:31:08 +0000

I’m not all doom and gloom. I’m really not, but I was having a conversation with some friends about the world, and what would really happen if someone ~~or some country~~ detonated a nuclear device here, in America. Well, our economy would well and truly tank, and the population would do whatever they believe is necessary to survive. There will be rioting in the streets, no law and order, and the people will be pretty much on their own. The people will take what they need, when they need it, while they can, and by force if necessary. In the long run, having a stockpile of guns and bullets won’t matter, people will do whatever is necessary to survive. Food and water and gas and clothes. People will adapt to the bare minimum, or they’ll die trying. All the means to defend you and yours will be gone in short order. I guess people will need to find a place that is defendable, and do the best they can. The new clans, for lack of a better phrase. There won’t be any government for the people to depend on.

It would be very easy for anyone to launch a nuclear tipped missile from a small ship, barge, or yacht close to our shores. Easy. No country to retaliate against, but after, say NY or Washington, or LA, or anywhere, is flattened…what will the U.S. do? Nothing. Who do we retaliate against? No one. Our enemies know no borders. We’d have to nuke two thirds of the world, and that is a no win situation. We are hated by more people than love us. It won’t be “all for one and one for all”…it will be “one for one and one for one”.

If an attack like this did take place, you can bet your bottom dollar that no country would take credit. The world would say the perpetrators were totally unaffiliated “lone wolves” or “extremists” and, know, that we, in our cowardice, will never, ever respond. Not with this bunch we have driving now. They realistically can win this, because they know we won’t shoot back.

Also, lets say someone detonated a nuclear weapon (electromagnetic pulse or EMP) high in the atmosphere. That would put us back to the early 1800’s. It is possible. Read this.

What would you do? Hell if I know, but I’d probably try to make my way to the coast, commandeer a sailboat, and make my way south to the Caribbean, or somewhere with a climate that would be easily tolerable…grow vegatables and fruit, and catch a bunch of fish.

Anyway, it was an interesting conversation. Can you imagine if there were absolutely no electronic communications, and no vehicle would start?

Is The Volt Done?

Yabu — Sat, 10 Mar 2012 13:23:31 +0000

I had a bike EXACTLY like this when I was a young boy, I was pimped out before pimped out was cool. This could be mine. same color, same chrome, same slick, same everything, and I kept it, for the most part, waxed and clean like this one. My father would wash the car, and I’d wash my bike. Probably a bad move on my part, because it wasen’t long before he graduated me to “car wash” duty. You’ve got to feel the love, and feel the pain. Whatever. Anyway, this was a great bike…tight in the corners, even with a slick, it would do wheelies forever, and was a pleasure to ride. You could even double on it. I finally realized I needed larger wheels to do some long road work. Still looking for a picture. We use to build one bike out of three. Anyway, we use to name our bikes…this one was simply called “Greenie”. I would damn near give my left nut to still have it.

I’m going out on a limb here, but I’ll bet you the dinner of your choice the Chevy Volt production line NEVER gets up to full capacity again. Why build ‘em if people won’t buy ‘em? Of course, the government might force you to buy ‘em, and that’s another matter altogether. I grew up with Green.

I know Green.

Bad Options And The Bomb

Yabu — Tue, 06 Mar 2012 17:18:27 +0000

This mess with Iran is going to get way out of hand, already is, in my opinion. If Iran goes nuclear, they will use ‘em. No doubt. They will nuke Israel, and the U.S., if they can. If they get the Bomb, everyone in the Middle East will work to get one. These Iranian Islamofascist fanatical batshit crazy goat-fuckers want to see “End of Days” and the coming of the 12th Iman.

They will use it, make no mistake about it. They are not bluffing, and Israel knows this. The survival of Israel depends on destroying Iran’s nuclear program sooner rather later. They have no choice. They’ll have to do as much damage as they can without U.S. backing. Obama threw ‘em off the bus and under the truck. I truly wonder where Obama’s convictions lie. Is Obama a closet Muslim? I really don’t know, but I fail to understand his reasoning on anything. It makes no sense. A major war in the Middle East will be the worst possible “thing” that could happen, except the detonation of nuclear weapons. If that happens, we’re done. Hell, we might be done now. The biggest problem we have right now is Obama. Fact. Who’s side is he on?

Remember, Iran is not an Arab state; it is a Shiite Muslim theocracy that preaches how the “End Times” can be hastened if they provoke the war with the Great Satan. Who do you believe is the Great Satan? These Muslims kill each other every day. My brand is better than your brand. Fucking crazy. The fact is: in the end, the followers of Islam will kill everyone who does not believe as they do. They preach hate and death. They treat women worse than they treat pigs. They have no respect for anything civilized, and want to live in the 7th century. Maybe we should help ‘em out with that.

If someone is trying to kill me, I will kill them first…God willing.

Unless the mullahs fall from power and their government is overthrown, or their weapons program is severely damaged or destroyed, they will have a nuke in the near future. The West has fucked around and wasted time until there aren’t any good options… just bad and worse ones.

Fool’s Mate

Yabu — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 23:04:14 +0000

The luck of the draw. Nope. The luck of the dice. Nope. Any luck. Nope.

I love Chess, although I’m not really good at it. I, sometimes, can hold my own, but not very often. I can think through long games, depends on the conversation, and how much drink is involved.

I’ve played chess since my father taught me when I was a young boy. Really young. I have a good childhood friend, and we have a game or two or three or four or five every time we get together. I love those nights. He always wins, but recently I’ve been kicking his ass. I actually pulled this off once. Pissed him off.

Fool’s mate is a special case of checkmate in the game of chess. Chess is not a game of chance; it is based solely on tactics and strategy. Nevertheless, the game is so complex that even the best players can’t consider all contingencies. There are a few slight variations on the pattern – White might play f4 instead of f3 or move the g-pawn before the f-pawn, and black may play e6 instead of e5.

This is notable as being the shortest possible game ending in checkmate.

Shorter games have occured when a player resigns, agrees to a draw, or forfeits due to not showing up, or is too drunk to play.

You know what I love about the game of chess? No luck, period. No dice, and no luck of the draw.

Best board game ever.

It is, what it is.

Voter ID?

Yabu — Sun, 26 Feb 2012 11:27:37 +0000

Anybody seen this?

This is what will help get Obama reelected.

Un-fucking believable. I think I’ll go channel surf some TV. You know, get with the people who understand, maybe join a union. I’m all backed up on my American Idol shit and reality shows.
I’m gonna start paying more attention to what’s important. You know, like clothes and not-clever smart-ass lines, and dog ass ugly women who want to make a buck. It’s easy…don’t have to think. I guess in this day and age, you don’t have to think…you just have to follow the people who can’t think.

Hell, I’ll meet you at the shelter. I hear they love the Occupiers…first choice on grub and rubbers. Maybe I could make a fortune on toilet paper and tattoos, or street drugs, or whores, or blankets. Maybe I should teach History or Values. Maybe Math or Civics. Maybe how to load and shoot and reload and clean a gun. Who knows?

There are many people who need some guidance, and I’m here to help.

Seriously, you need a photo ID for just about everything, too many to list, and I cannot believe no ID is required to vote.

Do You Believe This Shit? UPDATED

Yabu — Sat, 25 Feb 2012 17:59:44 +0000

**UPDATED**

It has been pointed out that this sound bite was doctored. He actually said “grandfather”

Sorry about that, and I apologize. I should’ve checked because he’s not that stupid, but I still believe he’s a lier.

Just so you know, me and the Juju Woman were the first humans to land on the moon. We’ll tell you that story sometime.