It’s 6X18, and looks different with the arc of the sun. Hell, Stretch barks at it when the sun is at a certain angle. Strange.
And by the way, her donated Glass Doxie did really well at the silent auction yesterday, it was for a good cause.
Also, I like the clear pieces, but they might set the bush on fire.
He’s hooked up with a natural blond now. I’ve never seen a Doxie that color. She is a beautiful dog, and like I’ve said before, Stretch does have a way with the ladies.
Well, I received my new computer, a MacBook Pro. Sweet and as fast as a good looking woman should be. My backups restored and my applications migrated and updated with no problems at all. None. I have all my data to the bit. I still have a few wrinkles to iron, but no big deal. Everything came across perfectly.
I can’t tell you how important it is to have good (multiple) backups. I’m serious, back your stuff up in multiple places or on multiple devices.
This new box is a little different though. I’ve had many laptops since there were laptops, but this one is way too cool. Fast like you would not believe. The second display is seamless…runs like a scalded dog. Boots in 15 seconds, or less.
It’s almost like it knows what I want it to do without telling it.
I’m not getting into the operating system stuff. Many people don’t like a Mac. I could care less, but I’ve used ‘em all…operating systems that is.
A Mac is like slow dancing with a beautiful woman who wants to take you home.
The Juju Woman is from Kentucky, so today is a big day. First, we’re racing Stretch, and then we’ll be doing shots of Kentucky bourbon and Tequilla, wearing hats, and eating Burgoo (google it) Mexican Burritos (never done those before), because the Derby landed on May 5th. It’s always held on the first SAT in May. Kill two birds with one stone, so to say.
Just so you know:
The thoroughbred is the fastest breed of horse in the world, and can maintain a speed of 45 miles per hour for a distance of more than a mile, making the Derby’s 1&¼ mile-long race the fastest two minutes in sports.
The typical thoroughbred horse is capable of running only a quarter of a mile or so at its peak speed, so much of the strategy of racing is determining the best moment at which to start the burst.
Colts and geldings can’t carry more than 126 pounds, and fillies can’t carry more than 121 pounds.
And in the final stretch the horses jockey for position and make their furious dash for the finish line. In 127 races, only 21 horses have ever led from start to finish, so expect some excitement in the last quarter-mile.
And remember that in the end it’s not the jockey; owner or trainer that is the difference between winning and losing . . . it’s usually the horse’s nose.
As for the Burgoo, we’ll be substituting a grilled pork tendorloin (we’ll pull it when it’s done) instead of squirrel. The Juju Woman will be using her special charcoal configuration as usual, and it will be damn good. Always is. She is my grill girl.
Hell, we’re trying to honor the Kentuckians and the Mexicans in one fell swoop.
Y’all bet on Stretch in the Doxie race, he’s in good shape. Post time is 2:00 pm. He will feel your Karma.
I post this every year, because I’m all about the truth.
Most people don’t know that back in 1912, Hellmann’s mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York.
This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico. But as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York. The ship hit an iceberg and sank, and the cargo was forever lost.
The people of Mexico, who were crazy about mayonnaise, and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were disconsolate at the loss. Their anguish was so great, that they declared a National Day of Mourning, which they still observe to this day.
The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5th and is known, of course, as Sinko de Mayo.
Stretch will be racing this SAT. This is an annual event, and he is entered every year. That little fucker is FAST. Today, we’ll do some more time trials, and tomorrow will be a laid back day of rest. We do practice, and Stretch has a Bionic Back. He’s fast, if they don’t put a bitch in the lane next to him. At least he has his priorities straight. This will be a drag race, three heats, which is good. He does spin out in the curves, occasionaly. Since I will be starting him, and the Juju Woman will be at the finish line, I will ensure there is no bitch in heat in the next lane over. Boys will be boys.
If Doxie races dont make you smile, nothing can.
Trust me on this.
I just ordered a new maxed out Catdaddy Macdaddy. Not going to get into OS wars, but I prefer Unix over Windows. To each their own. No big deal. I have a choice, for now. Hell, I bought 1,000 rounds of .357 & .45 yesterday, because I could choose. Slim pickings on bullets around these parts lately.
Anyway, back to my thought:
I checked my order shipping, and below is what I found. My Apple shipped from China.
Anchorage, AK, United States 05/01/2012 3:27 P.M. Departure Scan
05/01/2012 1:20 P.M. Arrival Scan
Shanghai, China 05/01/2012 9:47 P.M. Departure Scan
05/01/2012 8:54 P.M. Departure Scan
Shanghai, China 04/30/2012 10:13 P.M. Export Scan
04/30/2012 6:08 P.M. Arrival Scan
04/30/2012 1:59 P.M. Departure Scan
04/30/2012 12:20 P.M. Origin Scan
China 04/30/2012 11:01 P.M. Order Processed: Ready for UPS
China will become the next superpower, if not already. Hell, they own our debt, and can crush us without a shot fired. They know this, and they are counting on Americans to become more lazy than they are. We have kids graduating from college who don’t know shit. They can’t find a job. They then go for an advanced degree, spend more money, and still can’t find a job. They’re in some major debt. (I believe Trade Schools will make a major comeback). The government loves it. The more money you owe, the more control they have. We’re being fucked from the inside out, and nobody is paying attention, but they are paying attention to reality shows. Go figure.
I’m not the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I’m telling you…pay close attention to China. They have a plan. We don’t. We take too much for granted.
I’m telling you, when an American company can make more money having their product manufactured or built on the other side of the plant, and ship it over here, we’re fucked.
Think about what you will do if there is a run on the banks. What will you do if the U.S. dollar is devalued? Look at what happened in Argentina. Seriously, study it. Formulate a plan, and do not believe the media is talking reality. They need to make money, and they will do it at your expense. Think about what would happen if the government took control of the media. Look at history before you make a decision. People usually believe what they hear.
On another note: If anyone belives thay BHO was responsible for taking out OBL, they’re smoking crack.
Burned big time…Not that anyone gives a shit, but last night I burned the everloving fuck out of my left hand index and bird finger. Hot skillet. I could smell my flesh. Damn, I could smell it. That’s not good. Hurt like a motherfucker, wait, I already said that. I went for the ice first thing, and the Juju Woman broke for the Stretchengetti for a fresh slice of Aloe. My dog Stretch knew something was not right because I was jumping around and cussing like a southern…well, you know what I mean. I’m talking down on my knees is pain. Hurt like a motherfucker, wait, I already said that. I’m saying it again. I did the ice deal for a long time, did the aloe swipe multiple times. No problem, I’m good to go. It’s like it never happened. Gotta love that fresh aloe.
Everyone should have a aloe plant nearby.
It’s official. The U.S. is no longer engaged in a “war on terrorism.” Neither is it fighting “jihadists” or in a “global war.”
I feel better now. How about you? I think I’m going to take my American passport and go tour the Middle East. I guess I’m safe (the government says I am), but I really want to know who surrendered. If Obama’s mob says it’s so, it must be so. Hell, the government has my best interests at heart, right?
You have got to be fucking kidding me. What are these people thinking? I’m at a loss for words.
May 6, 2012
A Couple Of Dogs
Sometimes you just need a hot dog, or two, and a cold beer, or two.